| B |
(knock at the door)(sharply) Come
in and sit down please!(W comes in and sits) |
| W |
I'm sorry I'm late but I got held up on my
way to work |
| B |
Yes I'm sure you did, just as you have for
every day in the last few weeks. Miss Smythe, what time
does this office open in the morning. |
| W |
Nine o'clock |
| B |
What a pity we never seem to have your
company much before nine thirty. |
| W |
I'm very sorry, but I assure you that I
always leave home in plenty of time - things just happen
to me. |
| B |
Isn't that strange - I always leave home
on time and get here with sufficient time to read the
paper and have a cup of coffee first! |
| W |
I'm sorry, I don't mean to be late and
will try harder. |
| B |
Oh, come on. What really gets me are the
lame excuses. Take last week for example, let's say
Thursday. You came on the Tube but were left sitting in a
tunnel because of a person who had conveniently jumped
under a train at Oxford Circus. |
| W |
Somebody really did though and it was on
London Today in the evening - don't you have any sympathy
for his family? |
| B |
Of course I do, I am just a bit short
of sympathy for people who use him as an excuse to loiter
on their way to work. |
| W |
(sounding grieved) But I didn't! |
| B |
And what about Friday - you had a friend
who was taken ill and were stuck in Casualty all night
and your car got clamped in the hospital car park. |
| W |
Yes, really - I couldn't leave her and
when I got back to my car it was clamped. |
| B |
How imaginative - I'd never have thought
of that one. |
| W |
But it really happened and I even have the
receipt for the fine with the time stamped on it. |
| B |
And on Monday - someone broke into your
car and you had to spend an hour while the police checked
it out. |
| W |
Yes, you can ask them if you want. You
don't believe me do you? . |
| B |
Miss Smythe, I like to think that I am a
caring employer but I am getting to the point where my
good nature is wearing thin. I expect you have some
fantastic tale to tell me about how you were late this
morning. What was it - you family were abducted by
aliens? |
| W |
Well actually, as I was coming on the
tube, and suddenly the carriage started to fill with
smoke so I pressed the emergency button. Did you know it
took 10 minutes for the driver to evacuate the train and
find out what was going on. Luckily it wasn't serious. If
you don't believe me, ring the Victoria Line Controller.
I'm sorry to be late but it was out of my control. |
| B |
Miss Smythe I could sack you, but I am a
reasonable man, and as Shakespeare said - the quality of
mercy is not strained so you have a second chance. |
| W |
Thank you - you're such a kind man. I
really will try harder to not have so many mishaps. |
| B |
Thank you Miss Smythe (W leaves).
Now to get on with some work.(B uses the telephone) |
| W |
Ah, could you get me Sam Brown please -
what? - he's been sacked? Who sacked him? Miss Smythe?
Why?.......... You mean just because Sam lost a file she
sacked him. ......unsympathetic? You bet that's
unsympathetic. Could you ask accounts to make a set of
P45s up for Miss Smythe? Thanks. |
